I wish that one day I would mean something to someone.
I saw the most beautiful young man yesterday, took my breath away as he looked in to my eyes, it was as if he looked straight into my soul. . i felt him, i can still feel him.
We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone. [Orson Welles].
Have you ever been surrounded by people and still feel unnoticed, keeping yourself from letting out those silent screams that only you can painfully hear, feeling like there’s no one who cares enough to hear you out.
Nowadays most of the conversations I have with people involve words like “hi”, “how are you?”, “good”, “that’s good”, “see you”. I walk in public places and feel like people are seeing through me and not at me, what has happened with me? have i been so busy that i didn’t realise that i began to vanish day by day and now it’s is like i do not exist at all? What happened to those people who love me? Conversations with them is so rare. The “close friends” have become a smaller group and with my family, well everyone seems to think that personal life should be kept to themselves. It’s just me now, i don’t think it would be any different if people become extinct and i’m the only one left, at least i would feel comfortable talking to myself. I feel like i carry a disease since no one tries to get close to me, i feel so distant from people, i feel like i’m living in the shadows and i’m the only one there. I’ve become unnoticed.
It feels like somebody took my heart and dropped it into a bucket of boiling tears. At the same time somebody else is hitting my soul in the crotch with a frozen sledgehammer. And then a third guy walks in and starts punching me in the grief bone. and I’m crying. and nobody can hear me…. because I’m terribly, terribly, terribly….. alone.
Following
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“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.”— (via iamsarcastic)
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“It feels like somebody took my heart and dropped it into a bucket of boiling tears. At the same time somebody else is hitting my soul in the crotch with a frozen...”
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